A priest dies and is waiting in line at the Pearly Gates. Ahead of him is a guy who's dressed in sunglasses, a loud shirt, leather jacket, and jeans.Saint Peter addresses this cool guy, "Who are you, so that I may know whether or not to admit you to the Kingdom of Heaven " The guy replies : "I'm Jack, retired Continental Airlines Pilot from Houston". Saint Peter consults his list. He smiles and says to the pilot, "Take this silken robe and golden staff and enter the Kingdom." The pilot goes into his robe and staff.
Next, it's the priest's turn. He stands erect and booms out, "I am Father Bob, pastor of Saint Mary's in Pasadena for the last 43 years." Saint Peter consults his list. He says to the priest, "Take this cotton robe and wooden staff and enter the Kingdom. "Just a minute," says the good father. "That man was a pilot and he gets a silken robe and golden staff, and I get only cotton and wood. How can this be?" "Up here - we go by results," says Saint Peter, "When you preached - people slept; when he flew - - people prayed."
Thursday, April 10, 2008
George Bush visits a Primary School
President George Bush is visiting a primary school today and he visits one of the classes. They are in the middle of a discussion related towordsand their meanings.
The teacher asks the President if he would like to lead the class in the discussion of the word, "tragedy."
So the illustrious leader asks the class for an example of a"tragedy."
One little boy stands up and offers, "If my best friend, who lives next door, is playing in the street and a car comes along and runs him over, that would be a tragedy."
"No," says Bush, "that would be an ACCIDENT."
A little girl raises her hand: "If a school bus carrying 50 children drove off a cliff, killing everyone involved, that would be a tragedy."
"I'm afraid not," explains Mr. President. "That's what we would call a GREAT LOSS."
The room goes silent. No other children volunteer. President Bush searches the room. "Isn't there someone here who can give me an example of a tragedy?"
Finally, way in the back of the room, a small boy raises his hand. In a quiet voice he says, "If Air Force One, carrying Mr. & Mrs. Bush, were struck by a missile and blown up to smithereens, by Osama bin Laden, that would be a tragedy."
"You beauty," exclaims Bush, "that's right. And can you tell me WHY that would be a TRAGEDY?"
"Well," says the boy, "because it wouldn't be an accident, and it certainly wouldn't be a great loss."
The teacher asks the President if he would like to lead the class in the discussion of the word, "tragedy."
So the illustrious leader asks the class for an example of a"tragedy."
One little boy stands up and offers, "If my best friend, who lives next door, is playing in the street and a car comes along and runs him over, that would be a tragedy."
"No," says Bush, "that would be an ACCIDENT."
A little girl raises her hand: "If a school bus carrying 50 children drove off a cliff, killing everyone involved, that would be a tragedy."
"I'm afraid not," explains Mr. President. "That's what we would call a GREAT LOSS."
The room goes silent. No other children volunteer. President Bush searches the room. "Isn't there someone here who can give me an example of a tragedy?"
Finally, way in the back of the room, a small boy raises his hand. In a quiet voice he says, "If Air Force One, carrying Mr. & Mrs. Bush, were struck by a missile and blown up to smithereens, by Osama bin Laden, that would be a tragedy."
"You beauty," exclaims Bush, "that's right. And can you tell me WHY that would be a TRAGEDY?"
"Well," says the boy, "because it wouldn't be an accident, and it certainly wouldn't be a great loss."
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